Yay! Hatemail!!!
Yay! Hatemail!!! EVERYONE SAY HAIL SATAN FOR OUR DEAR FRIEND REV!!!!
You dirty little rag doll.
You can call me Ann :P
How dare you, how dare you insuniate that I could be anything else then a genuine Reverend of the Holy Church of Jesus Christ of Grand Rapids Michigan ?
I'm sorry ... twas harder than me ... and besides ... with the foulness that comes out of your mouth ... I doubt any part of your being is very clean. Well ... I guess down there in the south its prutty hard to find running water you clean yourself with ... and the cattle's watering hole .... well ... I guess if you like mud its always a possibility
I dunno ... Thomas an Mrs ... I just thought it was some drag/religion fetish thing.
When you burn in hell, skanky lil slut, and I pray the Lord to have mercy on your soul... who'll be laughing then?
As I said before .... I like warmth. And if I were you I'd start worrying about your own salvation. You're right thouth ... when I'm in hell I won't be laughing ... I'll be gnawing your head off just ot hear you scream.
You Canadians have no respect for anything.
Two words : George Bush
Boohoo, 4 soldiers were killed (God bless their soul- if any); Boohoo, our hockey players have cancer; Boohoo... well, why don't you just stop your whining and do a little bit more smiling?!
Yes .... you're right ... Americans are so much better. The whole getting back at those who hurt you with ten times the amount of force of the initial agression is just so much better. I wonder why it reminds me of my lil cousin ... one time he tried to do something and failed .... and then he kicked the dog (who happened to be passing by) just to vent his frustration. Did I mention he was 5 year old at the time?
God praise America! And if America can't be the best ... lets make sure no one is....
Do you think that Jesus was whining when he had it tough?
Nah ... I think twas more like screaming in agony as they planted nails into his hands and feet and then skewered him like a giant kebab.
He was sent here on earth to save us all by sacrificing His own life as the son of God,
Hey thats an interesting one ... what do Jesus and suicide bombers have in common? :P No no no! Its not that they were so clueless they didn't find a better way to solve their problems than by getting themselves killed. But in the end ... maybe by not reproducing they do us a service. Wonder if anyone had ever nominated Jesus for the Darwin Awards
so when in misery, He kept that genuine beautiful smile that makes him our Lord and Friend.
And so do injured people when you pump them full of morphine ...
Do you have a friend, Ms. Master?
No but it does make me smile to think that you're not one of them :)
Do you realize, or perhaps, do you understand that you always have a Friend in Jesus. He will listen, but not judge;
So he's the guy who's just there but doesn't do shit. Ya know ... that person who's so annoyingly there and yet way passive that you have to dust him every other week.
He will take your pain and give you relief;
I think I'd rather have a Tylenol ....
He will love, but not demand.
I thin I'd rather have a fish ...
There, now you just meditate on that little paegan.
Don't worry ... I'll put in a good word with the boss for you during my next satanic ritual ... just so you two can start to know each other. Ya know ... since your gonna have to spend eternity together an all.
May the Lord be with you,
May de Ford bewitch you ....
Rev. Thomas McCoil, Mrs.
Holy Church of Jesus
Christ of Grand Rapids Michigan
OOOHHH!!! More Hatemail!!!! ...
Good day to you,
Well good day to you too mister Jeremiah Smith
I am contacting you in regards to your horrible, horrible web site. Since I haven't written any mail yet today, I thought I would make you the target of my religious enlightenment.
Wow ... I just feel so special now ... can you hear me blushing?
Why do you wasted bandwidth building a site like that? Don't you see you are doing more harm than good? You are destroying the self-esteem of all those hard working people who make kitchen appliances. What have they done to you?
Hey ... if you've read my website you'll know I've already apologized for offending the sense of web design of all ya tasteless people out there. About the poor people at GE well ... too bad for them ... I'm sorry if I broke their little "illusions" regarding their "innocent" appliances ... its not like I pulled this whole theory out of my nose ... I have facts and proofs ... What have they done to me : scared me, tried to poison me, killed my pets, killed my roommate and replaced her with someone who's obviously a clone ... oh ya ... and they tortured Elmo. What was I supposed to do ... just stand there and be a zombie.
They are children of god too, you know? And whether you want it or not, you are one of god's flock too.
Children eh? Don't you find such an expression a bit pejorative ... are you calling the rest of the planet a bunch of immature brats? ... A flock eh? Wow ... now please explain to me why I should be grateful of being part of something usually used to describe animals who behave similarly and do everything together ... and in a more pejorative way ... to describe behavior that lacks originality. I'm sorry ... you're free to play sheep if you like ... I'll pass.
Take a few seconds and reflect upon this passage from the holy book:
"I saw in the night visions, and behold, on the clouds of the heavens came one like a Son of man, and He came to the Ancient of days and was presented before Him. And there was given Him (the Messiah,) dominion and glory and kingdom, that all peoples, nations, and languages should serve Him. His dominion is an everlasting dominion, which shall not pass away and His kingdom one which shall not be destroyed" (Daniel 7:13-14)
Can you spell megalomania?
Don't you see? Jesus loves you!
Good for him. If it makes him happy I don't anything wrong with that ... except if it makes me waste time.
It's up to you to embrace the light and join us in prayer. It's not like you have a choice!
Ok so if I get you right you're telling me to waste time (or pray or whatever you want to call it) in order to be part of something I'm already part of and can't avoid. I'm sorry but my economists instincts are acting up again. If you get something for free ... and you'll get it no matter what ... please explain why I would rationally want to pay for something like that.
Why not make a constructive web site, like the folks at http://www.capalert.com or http://www.bible.com/jesus/jesus.html ?
Have you ever considered the following fact : if you take a ton of bat guano and pile it up in one giant pyramid and let it dry ... well technically you've "built" something ... thus have been "constructive" ... So ... wana make a guano pyramid? I thought so. Same rationale applies to born again wacko sites. In other words ... no thank you, I've already been sick today.
Please repent,
I think you know what my answer to that is .... but its been nice talking to you ... and remember ... if you hate Kookiemaster's guts ... why not take advantage of Project N.E.M.E.S.I.S.' services.
Brother Jeremiah Smith of the Holy Church of Jesus Christ of Grand Rapids Michigan
Have
a nice day in delusion land
Yours
truly,
Ahhh...I have been waiting for this for SOOOO long...a nice excuse to vent my pent up rage...and its all thanks to you Mrs. Thomas McCoil! Big hug to you :)
So this is what the nice Mrs. Rev. McCoil had to say:
Hi, I've been browsing your site for the past couple hours and I must say I have never...ever had the misfortune of passing onto such an awfull amount of crap in my entire life.
A few hours eh...wow...aren't we a slow reader :P
It
is poorly (...not at all) designed! The pictures are in low-resolution
The girl in the pictures is ugly as sin... and she's
dressed!
The stories are boring and insignificant Plus- and that's the worst- you
dared end the life of a poor innocent creature of God just to prove your
random babble about your Kitchen appliances, Oh gimmee-a-break.
Yes...low resolution is such a pain...God forbid we would have to suffer a site that actually loads quickly. "The girl in the pictures is ugly as sin" ... well... why don't you send me a picture of you and we'll let the public decide...
"And she's dressed!" You sound disappointed ... I know I know... you went on a search engine...typed "appliances" ... got all hopefull bout the new sex site you would find... oh well. Better luck next time.
"you dared end the life of a poor innocent creature of god" So basically what you are saying is that a plastic fish is a creature of God? This must be SOME alternative religion you practice.
I bet you ain't nothing but a boring fat false blonde half-byotch white-trash stupid annorexic mother-fucking slut with too much... and I mean WAY too much spare time on your hands.
Now this is an interesting idea. Being fat and anorexic at the same time. Are you calling me an incompetent? Be carefull now ... I might actually start to feel hurt. My hair is not blond its orange but you are right on one count though... I am white .... so I say kudos to you Reverend!
As for being a half-byotch you'll have to enlighten me on that one since it doesn't seem to be a real word.
You'll burn in Hell for your sins, for even God all-mighty won't forgive the amounts of idiocy your site provides this world.
Well...I've always hated winter anyway. And judging from the amount of cursing in your email it looks like I'll have company.
Sincerly
disgusted,
Rev.
Thomas McCoil
(Mrs.)
This is a nice concept... Mrs. AND apparently the wife of a reverend. Which religion and region is that anyway? Let me guess... Bible Belt. You know down there where you mary your cousin because the goat turned you down.
Well...contrary to what you say I don't have THAT much time to waste so thats all for now...
Ciao...
Kookiemaster
And for all of you who would want to talk to the nice Mrs. Thomas McCoil you can reach her there
Hopefully more to come.